When I was pregnant, I had a plan. I devoured parenting books, pinned lists like crazy, and mentally noted dozens of tactics for baby sleep, baby shushing, baby food, baby teeth.. the list goes on.
Looking back, I was doing what I felt was right at the time.
Not unlike you other mamas, I like feeling prepared. So reading reviews and combing through blogs, forums, and baby books was the best way I knew how to prepare for becoming a parent and I’m so glad I equipped myself with that knowledge.
It’s tough to make mom decisions and without information, it’s even tougher.
Yet, I feel like a different person as a parent than I did as a pregnant woman.
It reminds me of that Maya Angelou quote that is so, so true:
Prime example: I thought I wanted our baby to sleep in her crib.
It’s true, I arrogantly stated (on more than one occasion) that she would sleep in our room for a month, maybe two, then we would transition to her own room and she would sleep soundly in her own crib down the hall.
HA. HA. HA.
- Logic will tell you that everyone in the family needs their sleep.
- Books will tell you how babies naturally make noises in the night and you won’t get any sleep if you’re leaping out of the covers every time your newborn jostles and murmurs.
- Blogs will tell you how much harder it gets to transition, the longer your little one sleeps in your room or bed.
I’ll tell you what, I appreciate the studies and the advice and the science, I do. But personally, I LOVE having my baby girl next to me!
Her little noises are so precious and her sleepy sighs in the middle of the night are not a nuisance, they melt my heart. To be able to touch her warm, chubby hand and feel her head full of soft hair, actually makes me sleep better.
And if we’re just being honest, it didn’t take long for me to begin wondering how soon we could say bye-bye to the bassinet and just move her into bed with us (maybe it was the late-night dream feedings that had me dreaming up alternatives).
I couldn’t wait to snuggle her close. For her first few months, we felt like it was safest to follow the room-sharing, not bed-sharing principle. But don’t think for a moment that I was about to bring that sweet, soft bundle snug in my arms as soon as I could! And I don’t even care.
I changed my mom mind.
For me, I cannot imagine letting these precious nights pass me by. Her hand reaching out to find me, dreamy stretches, and early morning smiles: these are moments that belong only to us.
It won’t last long. And remembering that is what makes it special instead of inconvenient.
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Remember now, I was that mom-to-be who didn’t want to share a room, much less a bed. I had a plan that I thought was right on track.
The thing is, I never could’ve taken into account the connection I have with this tiny little person.
That variable just didn’t mean as much to me before I became her mom. I knew she was a special baby, but now she’s my baby.
Now that she’s here in my arms, in my room, in my bed (all up in my space), I couldn’t be happier.
This is right where I want her.
Not being able to smell that sweet breath and kiss that fuzzy forehead without a trip down the hallway? No thanks!
The point is, I refuse to feel guilty or like I’m failing if I don’t stick to the plan.
BECAUSE THIS IS THE PLAN NOW.
Sometimes it’s calculated and strategic and sometimes it’s on the fly, dude!
Listen Mama, gathering all that info helps you make a plan, but when it comes down to making the right decisions for your family, you gotta say a prayer and go with your gut.
There’s a chance you might make some wrong choices, but remember you are the most equipped person to make those decisions for your child. Have a little faith in yourself and your ability to forge a new plan when necessary.
I’ve taken both information and intuition into account and plowed forward doing what I knew in my heart was best.. oftentimes veering from the set course.
I’ve changed my mom mind with confidence and never looked back.
And you have permission to change yours, too.
by grace & grit,
How did YOU learn the difference between information and intuition?
I’d love to hear your story!